Club dating game
It’s got to be a staged, mutual process, with a peace treaty to end the Korean War and real security assurances. I need to know where you stand, Mb S, before I can really get into bed with you.
But I’m worrying now that you’re getting cold feet. Kim Jong Un: You showed me a good time in Singapore, Mr. But then you sent your emissaries to my capital and they tried to twist my arm. I was very clear about what you need to give me for this relationship to work out. Steve Bannon: Should we be expecting yet another lawsuit from a wronged woman?
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Confidential tip: he’s been making eyes at our contestant for several years now. He loves waging war on really, really poor countries, locking his country’s richest men in a hotel and extorting money from them, and magnanimously letting his citizens go to the cinema once in a while. And it’s time now to meet our contestant, who has been wooing strongmen for six decades. This dear friend of mine is sure to make any dictator’s head spin.
And welcome once again to the Dictator Dating Game. He loves uncontested elections, poisoning his overseas enemies, and moonlit walks along the Crimean beach. He’s not technically the head of his country, but he sure acts that way!
I had a great time with Rocket Man but the follow-through has been disappointing so far. You’ll be spending three days and two nights in one of the Middle East’s premier luxury getaways.
Don’t you mean — Donald Trump: Right, metabolically. Before we get to tonight’s Big Choice, I just want to make sure that our contestant is happy with our selection tonight.
▼ All four girls are excited that you’re joining their club. But still, those warnings from the beginning are always in the back of your head, waiting and wondering…. If you’re intrigued at all, then I highly recommend downloading the game (for free! You could watch a Let’s Play on You Tube, but the game is pretty short (I beat it in less than four hours), and doing it yourself is part of the experience. I never thought my favorite video game of the year would be a dating sim/visual novel, but here we are, and I will never look at the genres the same way again…
Their conversations and personalities make it easy to forget all about those warnings at the beginning….
Donald Trump: Oh, it will eventually end up in my pocket one way or another. We’ve determined that our contestant clearly prefers dictators over democrats, and in today’s culture we must respect a person’s sexual preferences. President, which of these three strong, mysterious men will you take along with you on a dream weekend of guy talk, fast food, and strategizing world domination? We know that our contestant feels most at home in his own properties.
Steve Bannon: Don’t you mean that she owes the United States a trillion dollars? Steve Bannon: That’s our due diligence part of the show. We’re sending you for a weekend extravaganza to…Trump International Golf Club in Dubai!
Confidential tip: He’s been practically dating our contestant’s son-in-law, but now he wants to move to the next level. Mohammed bin Salman: Yes, it’s true: I like Jared very much, but in Saudi Arabia we’re allowed to have as many as four wives. Now, are you happy to see us or is that a Jared in your pocket? He’s got small hands, a monstrous ego, and a limited command of the English language. One day we should give that a shot here in America.