Spiritual leadership in dating
Don’t let dating or the desire for marriage become your god. How does the person you are dating enhance and encourage your growth in Christ? Cultivate transparency and honesty in all relationships.In light of eternity, other things are far more important. Finding the right person is not nearly as important as the right person. We build walls by assuming that we will be liked if we could only be different from what we are.
Some husbands wonder, "What am I supposed to do – act like a preacher?
Learn to share thoughts, feelings, ideas, interests, faith, etc. If need be, make short-term covenants, agreeing to relate to each other within a certain framework of expectations. God always honors our decisions and we should honor each other’s.
Live the relationship day by day and try to not evaluate it too frequently. Jealousy is a key sign of our desire to possess another rather than to release. Develop many lines of communication with your friend, especially in the areas of dialogue, problem solving, mutual interests, awareness of each other’s daily living patterns and habits, emotions, affection, service to others, spiritual life and family relationships. Sexual expression is a powerful form of communication and should be carefully limited in order to allow other areas to develop.
God’s ultimate plan for the world is to bring everything together in Christ. His ultimate plan for each of us is that we be reconciled to God through Christ (Colossians , 22; Romans –26) and that we be transformed day by day to be more like Christ (2 Corinthians ; Romans , 30). Many people pursue relationships as the solution to their problems, such as insecurity, loneliness, lust, lack of direction or bad self-image. (Note: Dating non-Christians is a problem if you haven’t clearly decided what you want to be in your relationship with Christ.
God is not going to ask at the judgment, “Were you married? ” Dating and even marriage may or may not contribute to God’s goal for you. It is easy for many to want marriage more than God, and so they are willing to compromise.
God’s solution is to “seek first his kingdom and his righteousness” (Matthew ).